About Me…

I’m Ruki Panjwani—a Licensed Professional Counselor Associate (Supervisor: Toni La’Zurs)

At the heart of my work is one core belief:
Relationships don’t just fall apart because people stop trying.
They break down because something deeper, unseen and unspoken gets in the way.

Many of the couples I work with have been to therapy before.
They’ve learned tools. They’ve read the books.
But when tension runs high, those tools feel impossible to use.
And they’re left thinking: “Why can’t we just fix this?”

That’s where I come in.

A Different Way of Working

I don’t start with tips and tricks.
I start with what’s underneath:

• The old hurts that never got repaired

• The patterns you learned from the past

• The invisible pressure of roles, culture, or family expectations

• The ways you each protect yourselves when things get hard

I help you slow things down enough to notice what’s actually happening between you, not just the behavior, but the emotional logic underneath it. Together, we look at how each of you shapes and is shaped by the other in moments of closeness and distance. When you can hold that awareness, you begin to respond instead of react.

For couples who find words limiting, I often use metaphoric and symbolic imagery to give form to experiences that are difficult to express directly. This creative, reflective process helps partners access what lives beneath language — the emotional life of the relationship itself, and begin to sense how it longs to grow or repair.

In this work, we recognize that a relationship is not just two people interacting; it’s a living system with its own rhythms, needs, and direction. By attending to that shared field, rather than searching for fault, couples can start to listen to what their relationship is asking for. This helps couples rediscover a more fluid responsive dynamic.

What This Work Can Help With

When couples begin this kind of work, they often start to notice things shift:

• You feel less critical of each other

• You become responsive

• Arguments don’t escalate the way they used to

• You start feeling more like teammates again

• There’s space to be curious, instead of defensive

• And for many, it’s the first time in a long time you both feel emotionally intimate

A Little About My Background

I received my Master’s degree in Clinical Mental Health Counseling from Northwestern University, a program known for its depth in psychodynamic theory and systems thinking. I also bring advanced training in couple-specific methods like PET-C, Internal Family Systems, and trauma work.

But more important than the labels is this:

I see people in context.
Not as diagnoses. Not as “bad communicators.” But as complex, resilient human beings who are doing their best with what they’ve learned, until now.

If your past experiences with therapy felt too surface-level, and you’re looking for a more meaningful shift in your relationship, I’d be honored to support you.

Let’s talk…not just about what’s not working,
but about what might finally start to feel different.